I went back and read chapters 7-9 of the currently-posted (old) volume 2, and I was like, “Dang, how did chapter 7 turn out better than chapter 9? And 8 was better than 9 too!” >:O
I admit, I haven’t figured out yet what to do with those chapters in the rewrite. I want to keep them, but I might have to move chapter 9…
Well, if you haven’t noticed, I’ve posted revisions to chapters 1-5. I reserve the right to change the paragraphs on Rome’s desire, though. In fact, I’ve been considering taking out the hot spring scene altogether, because it’s premature for Rome to see Labriella naked. I left it in, because I think it shows that he actually cares despite his coldness. But I am afraid it detracts from future nakedness. The scene where Rome walks in on Labriella bathing in the servants’ quarters is definitely going to go, for that very reason.
This is where my revisions start to get complicated, because I’m actually rewriting things. I’m going to start blending the house cleaning with town, and then mix in the nobles. Rewriting events leading up to Rome’s first tavern visit will be tricky–as will getting across Labriella’s stubbornness without her outright rebellion. Goodbye circles, hello difficulty.